Printed on high quality Comfort Colors Heavyweight Cotton.
Gets softer with every wash.
 
Infused with the power of Hastur, this t-shirt will assist you in becoming the master of all of your wildest dreams. Have you been wanting a raise? Buy this shirt. Have you been waiting on your man to finally pop the question? Buy this shirt. Do you want to become the next tech mogul and have a house with walls that match your emotions? Once again... this shirt can be purchased.
 
*These claims cannot be proven, but why not give it a try?